Ed Willock

Excerpted from Fatherhood and Family, the new book from Angelus Press

Masculine holiness is on trial.

The Catholic religion is not just for women and children, but there are reasons why its practice has taken on an effeminate cast and why otherwise good men are justifiably turned off. The author cites four reasons how this situation has evolved in the Church and suggests a two-pronged first step to restoring masculine holiness which, in any case, must be lived if it is to endure.

By His own statement we are assured that Christ is less concerned about those who climb the tortuous paths of Mount Carmel than He is about the souls who wander directionless through the woods on the plains below. Many who are seeking God elsewhere than in His Church are not so much perverse in their choice of direction as misinformed by the false signposts erected by those who consider themselves among the elect. Among these wanderers are the men who have falsely concluded that "religion is for women and children."

 

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Those who frequently have encountered this remark uttered with emphatic vehemence will recall that certain tonal inflections and gestures implied a heresy not explicate in the words themselves. The argument presented more accurately would be stated, "religion is for women and children primarily" or "religion is for women and children exclusively. "

This attitude persists in varying degrees among many Catholic men today, much to the astonishment of the Church Militant, the Church Suffering and the Church Triumphant. Abraham and Moses, we can be sure, are not amused, nor is their brother patriarch of the New Testament, St. Patrick. The glorious choir of the apostles takes quiet but forceful difference with the contention of effeminacy. The admirable company of prophets shake their glorified beards in tangible evidence of masculinity. The white-robed army of martyrs, composed of both sexes, unhesitatingly testifies that religion merits the blood of men, whether male or female.

Those lesser saints, our venerable European forebears who fought manfully, lived verily and sometimes died courageously in the Faith so that we might inherit the gift, raise their baritone voices in protest at such a calumny. A clergy, masculine from cover to core, could not concur with such a view. If all that were not enough, the nail-pierced hands of Christ, calloused by years of manual labor, can be presented as clinching evidence of the masculinity of the Faith.

The temptation after such testimony is to throw the case out of court. On the surface the charge of effeminacy seems rash and unsubstantiated. We should, however, give the plaintiff an opportunity to state his case. In answer to the foregoing defense of the masculine nature of piety, his rebuttal might go like this: "You have proved only that Christianity is originally and traditionally masculine. If it is a living Faith, what evidence have we here in America that religion evokes a masculine piety or provokes a masculine dynamism? Show me signs of a virile Faith among American Catholic men!"

This question cannot be answered glibly. It cannot be pushed aside as irrelevant. We may recall the news stories of priests in war and peace administering with heroic courage to the needs of souls. Processions of Holy Name men and other public manifestations of masculine piety can be produced as evidence. But are these enough? Are they typical or isolated events? What about the vast majority of Catholic laymen? Can we point to their way of life as examples of Christian idealism and aspiration in startling contrast to their non-Catholic friends? I think not. I think masculine piety is on trial, and we might well examine the situation and make some sort of judgment.

One fact that is quite obvious is that religion appeals to the man in a different way from the way it appeals to the woman. It is the same Faith, it evokes the same virtue, but the disposition to it is different. As religious experience matures, as it passes from the elementary stage of psychological and intellectual union to sanctity and mystical union, the appeal and response tend to become the same regardless of sex. Until spiritual maturity is achieved, however, the psychology of the sexes is an important instrument in conversion and growth.

When stating a proposition concerning the psychological peculiarities of the sexes, a writer runs the risk of all sorts of misunderstandings. To avoid this as much as possible please bear in mind these qualifications of what I have to say. Psychology deals with tendencies, not qualities. The masculine and feminine persons represent two essential possibilities of the same nature. They are both equal in potentialities and equal in dignity. It is because they are essentially incomplete and oriented to each other that they tend to follow parallel and converging paths rather than identical paths. Neither revelation nor common sense admits of any essential inferiority of one sex to the other. The gifts are of equal value. The dependence is mutual. When I use the word effeminate I use it in a derogatory sense as distinct from the word feminine.

Effeminacy is a softness, a lack of discipline, a sensate romanticism which is a despicable characteristic either in man or woman. It is a perversion of feminine virtue just as ruthlessness and rationalism are a perversion of masculine virtue.

Human behavior shows that the tendency in the woman is to be concerned with persons and particulars. The tendency in the man is to be concerned with things and generalities. The loyalty of the woman usually finds its object in a responsive person. The loyalty of the man usually finds its object in a compelling cause. These facts, I believe are self evident and, fortunately, they are the only facts I need for the development of my argument.

Religion is loyalty to a God Who can be conceived of as a Person (for He is a Person) or a Cause (for He is the Good).

The saints know God as He is in Himself, as both the Person Who loves and is loved and as the Cause to be pursued and attained. In the first stages of holiness, however, the woman tends to seek a personal relationship of love whereas the man tends to seek a moving and satisfying ideal.

Now there is something paradoxical in the two conceptions of God, one as a Person and the other as an Ideal. As human beings we find it difficult to separate the idea of a person from the idea of a particular individual. For us, the idea of a person excludes all other persons. On the other hand the concept of an ideal abhors particularization. Goodness, justice, liberty, or love, are nothing unless they are universal and non-exclusive.

Since the Person with whom she seeks communion is invisible, the particular tangible instruments of the Faith become the loving object of the woman's devotion. Since the Ideal to which he aspires is a universal, the man is loath to limit this ideal to any particular place, form, or priesthood. Until the paradox of particularity and catholicity is resolved, the man is disturbed by the very limitations which appeal to the woman. She loves the church and the priest, the altar and the rosary, the hymn and the formal prayer because they are so familiar, so close and so tangible. He is suspicious of these things because they are so localized, so exclusive and familiar that they hardly seem to do justice to the Ideal which is all-inclusive, all-embracing.

At any time in history or in any place on the globe, this divergence of attitude between man and woman can be expected. In our time and in this country, the situation has been aggravated by the fact that practical Catholicism has assumed an effeminate cast. This effeminacy, evidenced in liturgical practices and standards of conduct, with emphasis on the personal, the sensate, the devotional, cannot be attributed to any one cause but to a number of historical trends both within and without the Church. These trends can be categorized loosely under the heading of secularism, and secularism has resulted in:

(1) The relegation of religion to one phase of human activity.

(2) The confinement of religion to the area of the church and the school.

(3) The regarding of the religious act as a personal secret quite divorced from any vital social significance.

(4) The divorce of faith from reason as though they were irreconcilable.

It is obvious that religion telescoped to such narrow dimensions focuses undue emphasis upon the aspects of the Faith most appealing to the feminine psychology. The home, the church and the school become for the Catholic mother the angles of a familiar triangle. She tends to direct her religious perceptions almost exclusively to that enclosure. These are her daily and particular concern because they involve the children and are within the scope of her normal interests. Man's activities and interests, even though they may radiate from the home, find their target in the shop and office, and the social and political problems of the day. All of these places and problems have been long divorced from religion as to ends as well as means. Whenever he enters the religious sphere, the man feels that he is in some sense entering the domain of the woman. Any parochial activity not specifically for men is, per se, for women. The Ideal, that concept of God psychologically attractive to man, can only touch him when it is made manifest in the work world, professional world, scientific world, and political world with which he is in contact. The secularist divorce which sets the mystical against the practical, and the facts of revelation against the facts of sensible observation, by inference pushes religion over to the distaff side of the table. This localization of religion to the secret intercourse and the parish buildings has produced the ghetto-Catholicism very apparent in many quarters. It would not be hard to prove that the ghetto complex is basically effeminate even when it expresses itself in violently defensive apologetics. The Ideal is catholic and of cosmic scope; it is affirmative and universal, impatient of ghettos, desirous of assimilating all things, assured of its universality. The spiritually immature man can be sympathized with when he is disheartened by a particularized, sensate, localized and maternal religiosity so at variance with the Ideal to which he clumsily aspires. The sight of such a facade is enough to drive him away before he has time to enter and discover that there is less contradiction in localized Catholicism than he first supposed. The fact that the Faith is being sold short tends to make the prospect underestimate its true value.

Few active Catholics are unaware of the general irresponsibility of men toward their religious duties. Steps have already been taken to restore liturgical practices to their proper purity which would remove the effeminacy and make them more psychologically appealing to men. Priests everywhere are working to induce men to come closer to the altar. Religion teachers of boys and young men are striving to masculinize religion. We are indebted to them (perhaps as much for their errors as for their successes) for making it possible to make certain suggestions for improvement tested by practice.

The great danger, I think, is that a study of the tendencies peculiar to man and woman might lead us to use such studies as a norm for prescribing apostolic techniques. We can make the mistake of supposing that that which is most psychologically attractive is the best form to use. That is too much like asking a patient to prescribe his own medicine. More than that it excludes, or merely tolerates, all of the unpleasant things that no one likes, such as sacrifice, suffering, penance and contrition.

An example of the false principle in practice would be to have parochial fashion shows for women who are already jeopardizing their souls' salvation by an inordinate interest in clothes. Another is parochial emphasis on sports for men who are already neglecting their Christian and patriotic responsibilities in pursuit of sports. Even in the hierarchy of psychological urges there is usually something higher to appeal to than vanity and playfulness. The lady parishioner who puts on the latest creation is less disposed if anything to put on her Creator. The virility of sports is not so contagious that religion will get it by contact. I realize that these things are merely "come-ons" to attract the people and are usually quite distasteful to the priest who uses the technique. It is my experience that such methods actually repel the people who would go to get pure and unadulterated religious training. If religion does not attract people in a day when people are hungry for a faith, it is not because religion is lacking in secular glamor but because religion is being spiked with adulterating syrups.

If the male or female psychology does not prescribe the technique of appeal, then of what use is the inquiry into the peculiarities of each? The answer is simply that Catholicism lived (not doctrine, nor a technique, nor a movement, nor a view), a living presence in a person, in a family, in a community, has an appeal to both men and women equally. Men may dislike devotional services, women may dislike study clubs, but they both like supernatural charity. Men may dislike sugary hymns and women may dislike sermons on unionism, but they both like supernatural fortitude. We need not look further for proof of this than the Catholic Worker movement. Whatever else the Catholic Worker has done, it has given an example of supernatural charity and supernatural fortitude that has attracted the interest of thousands. Literally hundreds of men have sought out the Catholic Worker houses because full-blooded, unadulterated virtue has an appeal that cannot be ignored. Even those who differ with the Catholic Worker opinions in whole or in part cannot deny the heroic virtue evidenced in its leaders.

If religion does not appeal to men, an inquiry into the reasons can help us, not by showing how to present the Faith, but how to practice it. The Faith when lived generates its own form. When it is lived it may provoke love and it may provoke hate, but never indifference.

Why is it that many men do not see the Ideal in Catholic life? I think it is because we Catholics do not exhibit either austerity or catholicity. The story is told of the man who sold all that he had to purchase the jewel of great price. This is the sort of testimony lacking today. As far as the outsider can see, the price of the jewel of Faith is adherence to a group of precepts in theory if not in practice, the obligation of Sunday Mass and a meatless diet on Fridays. The same Catholic in pursuit of a better standard of living exhibits a much greater propensity for sacrifice than he does in pursuit of the Ideal. The state also sets a higher price on citizenship through the levying of taxes, the ordering of our lives, and the asking of the same life in time of war. In the open market, for everyone to see, the jewel of Faith is marked down to a price lower than that of loyalty to mammon and loyalty to the state. It is difficult for the uninitiated to see that the jewel is worth more than the price quoted.

The key to the problem of masculine piety, to my mind, is found in the word Catholic. The word Catholic as an adjective to describe the Faith has a vertical as well as a horizontal meaning. The horizontal meaning is that, as a way of supernatural life, Christianity is for all mankind, and that the fruits of the Incarnation and the doctrine of salvation are meant for all men at all times. The Church was instituted to spread the Faith across the globe and down the centuries, alive in substance, precise in doctrine, healing and uplifting in its effect. The vertical meaning is that the nature of the Faith is to reorient all men and all things to God. There is nothing to which the Faith is irrelevant, and the relevance of everything is found in the Faith.

This vertical aspect of the Faith is seldom revealed in the attitudes and habits of today's Catholics. When it is understood and acted upon, men will see clearly that Catholicism is the ideal. They will see that Catholicism demands that Christ be the center and orientation of all our acts and all our desires. The jobs that we hold, the vocations we choose, the studies we pursue, the companions we keep, the recreation we enjoy, the ambitions to which we aspire, only make Christian sense if they are orientated to God and this not merely by intention but by their nature and end.

To summarize, we can say that men fail to see in Catholicism as generally practiced the all-embracing Ideal which is their first immature concept of God. They fail to see it first, of course, because of their spiritual immaturity, but also because the Faith as generally practiced has become effeminate and localized. We cannot very well increase their maturity until we have first attracted them to the spiritual director and the Sacraments. So the first step must be a testimony to them of austerity (as against effeminacy) and catholicity (as against localization).

It must be understood that in this particular case we cannot let the patient prescribe his own medicine. In other words, we are not looking for tricks and tactics artificially devised with which to lure the men into the churches. If men currently find juke boxes, beer, and sports inordinately appealing, that has nothing to do with us. From us they want some evidence of the Ideal, an ideal which when acquired will give them a joy, a stimulation and a virility that they are seeking now in the juke boxes, beer and sports.

 

Catholicism Lived

Stated in the fewest possible words the thing they seek, whether they know it or not, is an evidence of Catholicism lived. Catholicism lived is austere and it is catholic, and it is the only convincing testimony that Catholicism is directed to the Ideal.

Catholicism lived sounds very much like a definition of sanctity, but sanctity is not precisely what I mean. Catholicism lived is a group manifestation of Christian virtue, organized on the social level, unified on the intellectual level and orientated to God on the spiritual level. Just as the saint, as an isolated phenomenon, demonstrates the orientation of human personality to God, Catholicism lived is a community of persons which demonstrates the orientation of human society to God. The aspiration to personal sanctity is implied in it and is the vitalizing factor, but it is the group testimony of integrated Catholic living which is the immediate end of such an organization.

Let's consider briefly the practical steps that might be taken to bring such a group into existence within a parish. The Holy Ghost will provide different counsels, different opportunities and different apostolic material in different areas. I only devise this set of practical suggestions in order to demonstrate more clearly the theory of Catholicism lived.

Suppose we choose as the conceptual day for this revolutionary parochial venture the Feast of Christ the King, October 31. This great feast upon which day the Church makes present the coronation of Christ, King of all mankind, the end of all free and necessary activity in the universe, seat of benevolence and judgment, the proper object of all men's desires, works and prayers, is the most appropriate day for instituting a new order founded in Christ. The coming of the King should be anticipated with the same vigor and widespread proclamation as is usually occasioned by the annual parochial bazaar. Cards, posters, tickets, flyers, announcements, should be drawn up in bold and colorful phrases, telling of the advent of King Christ to reign over the entire world and specifically over that parish. Special emphasis should be brought to bear on the men of the parish, especially those who have been bored or dismayed by the dull complacency of the old era which is about to die. Mothers, wives and girl friends should be encouraged to impress upon their men that a new era of masculine piety is about to begin. Every man should be urged to go to Confession and Communion, leaving as little loophole for excuse as they get on Mother's Day.

The Day of the King will begin with a High Mass at 6:00am (Perhaps a vigil service the night before will get the men to bed early so that they can get up for this early Mass.) At the High Mass a sermon will be preached on Christ the King, Lord of our souls, Lord of our lives, Lord of our country, Lord of the universe, etc. Emphasis will be on austerity in His cause and catholicity in its furtherance.

The same sermon will be preached at all other Masses with the inference that all those who do not participate in the celebration of the feast are nothing less than traitors. In the afternoon there will be vespers, benediction and a procession, rain or shine (preferably rain so that everyone will get soaking wet). The procession will be to crown a statue of Our Lord, King of the Universe. The men will march attired in their work clothes, each carrying a tool of his trade or an object of his craft....These objects will be blessed and offered as symbols of the sacrifice of the man in his work to Christ. Each family, in the person of the husband, will be annexed to the new-found kingdom. Every child should be present to see his father and mother joined together in their new dedication.

After the procession a banquet will be served with food prepared by the housewives. It will be informal, noisy, friendly (no stuffed shirts or professional waiters). The less organized preparation for the banquet the better it will be. What one housewife lacks another will provide. Men and women will get to know their neighbors, exchanging a sandwich for an apple, or a bottle opener for a shaker of salt.

In the evening the baby-sitting teenagers will take over the children while the mothers and fathers, and the single men and single women, attend the first council of the government of Christ the King. The object of this meeting will be to get men and women to be the lay leaders of Catholic Action groups in the parish (for Catholic Action is the structure of the new kingdom). The qualifications for leadership must be rigorous: daily Mass and Communion, completely dedicated lives, apostolicity in society, the firm resolution to integrate their daily lives with the Faith.

These leaders when enrolled will be the contact of the laity with the priest. Working with their neighbors, they will carry the Faith out into those areas from which the priest has been excluded. He will mold their spirituality, bringing their immature zeal to a full fruition.

An inquiry conducted on various nights throughout the octave will help the leaders determine what practical problems they must focus their attention upon. The hidden kingdom of Christ in the heart must be made incarnate and visible through some particular apostolate. Perhaps a family apostolate will be the suggestion, or the Christianization of the local factory, or a missionary activity to help the Negro. The local need will stipulate the proper action to be taken.

When these organizations hit their stride the man who says "religion is for women and children" will have to do so in secret. The austerity of Catholicism lived, of families accepting their due quota of children as new subjects of Christ the King, of charity so that there is no one in need within the parish whether Catholic or not, of social justice unrelaxed in its vigilance to see that everyone receives his due, of catholicity in contributions of money and goods wherever in the world the need may be, of inquiry-searching the mind of God for new evidence of His greatness, and searching the universe for new fields to be redeemed, is that kind of austerity that will be masculine and Catholic beyond words.

When the newcomer enters the climate generated by a Catholicism lived, the paradox that bothered him will be resolved. The Good which he sought will soon be recognized as a personal, intimate God, localized in the Eucharist but yet Lord of the universe, particularized in His Church yet the proper object of the adoration of every nation.

The mature participation of the men by the same token will enlarge the field of the women's religious perceptions. They will recognize my God as the Good. They will see the direct relationship between social justice in unions, for the Negro, for the Jew, for the poor, and the my God of their spiritual devotion. The beholder will see in the activity of men and women living the Faith the reconciliation of the paradox of a God Who is the familiar object of devotion and the Good under Whose banner armies of men will march forever.